Why Your Identity Matters in Early Motherhood
Let’s talk about something that’s probably been swirling in your mind as you prepare for life with a new baby: your identity. Yep, the person you’ve always been, the one you’ve worked so hard to shape, and the one you fear might get a little lost in the shuffle of diaper changes, feedings, and sleepless nights.
I get it—it’s a big shift. And when you’re juggling the anticipation of meeting your new baby, the pressure to be the perfect mom, and your own aspirations and goals, it can feel like something’s got to give. That’s where the importance of your identity comes in. But here’s the thing: you’re not meant to lose yourself in motherhood.
In this episode, we will cover:
The importance of understanding and preserving your identity during the transition to motherhood.
Why a strong sense of self can help you navigate the challenges of new motherhood with confidence.
How taking care of your own needs can ultimately benefit your baby and family.
If you’re ready to embrace your identity and show up as your best self in motherhood, then this episode is for you!
Your Identity is More Than Just ‘You’—It’s the Foundation of Your Parenting
Okay, first things first: Your identity isn’t just some random thing you should toss aside for the sake of motherhood. It’s what makes you YOU—the ambitious, passionate, driven person who’s been working hard for years, juggling life’s demands, and, yes, crushing your goals. Your identity is the foundation of everything you’ve built up to this point—your career, your friendships, your routines. And here’s the truth: When your identity feels like it’s disappearing or shifting too much in motherhood, that can lead to feelings of overwhelm, resentment, and even anxiety.
I know that as a Type-A, organized, career-driven person, it’s important for you to feel in control. Motherhood throws curveballs, but you can still maintain a sense of who you are through the journey. It’s not about perfection (spoiler alert: it never is), but about being intentional with how you prioritize yourself along with your baby’s needs.
Real Talk: When you start losing yourself—when your whole world becomes the baby and nothing else—it becomes way harder to feel happy, confident, and fulfilled. And that’s no good for anyone.
Why Your Identity Matters: 5 Reasons to Keep Your “You” Alive
You’ll Be a Better Mom
The more you nurture yourself and your sense of self, the more you have to give to your baby. I know, it sounds counterintuitive, right? But the truth is, when you take care of your needs, you’ll have more patience, more energy, and more love to offer. Happy mom = happy baby.
Your Relationships Will Thrive
When you’re connected to your own identity, you’ll be a more present partner and friend. You won’t just be “the mom” or “the caregiver”—you’ll still be the strong, independent person your loved ones cherish. It’s all about balance, and trust me, your partner will appreciate the emotional connection you keep alive beyond the baby stage.
You’re More Than a Role
Yes, motherhood is a big role. But it’s not your only role. You’re still an individual. The more you nurture your personal passions, friendships, and hobbies, the better equipped you’ll be to handle the challenges of motherhood. Plus, your baby will see firsthand how important it is to prioritize your needs and maintain your passions.
Mental Health is Key
Feeling overwhelmed or anxious about losing yourself? That’s a big deal, and you’re not alone. Identity struggles can be linked to perinatal mental health issues like postpartum depression or anxiety. Keeping a healthy relationship with yourself gives you the mental space to navigate those challenges. When you feel connected to your identity, you’ll have the emotional resilience to get through the tough moments.
You’re Setting a Powerful Example for Your Baby
I get it—mom guilt is real. But think about this: when you show your child that it’s okay to put yourself first sometimes, you’re teaching them something invaluable. You’re showing them that it’s okay to be their own person, to have their own goals, and to chase their passions. That’s a lesson they’ll carry with them forever.
How to Hold On to Your Identity in Motherhood: Practical Tips
Now that we’ve established why your identity is so important, let’s get practical. You’ve got a lot on your plate, so I want to help you set yourself up for success in keeping your “you” intact.
Here’s what you can do now to make sure you don’t lose yourself after baby arrives:
Create a Postpartum Plan: Don’t wait until the baby is here to figure out how to maintain your routine. A clear postpartum plan, like my guide Postpartum on Purpose, can help you organize your life, set clear boundaries, and prioritize your needs while still caring for your little one.
Schedule “Me Time” into Your Day: I’m serious. It’s easy to think, “I don’t have time for me.” But you do. Even 15 minutes of alone time each day can help you recharge. Whether that’s a walk, a bath, or reading a book, make it a non-negotiable part of your day.
Set Boundaries with Your Baby (and Your Family): Boundaries aren’t just for your partner—they’re for you, too. If you need space, ask for it. If you need help, ask for it. People can’t help if they don’t know what you need.
Stay Connected to Your Career and Passions: It’s tempting to think you’ll just put everything aside for your baby. But let’s be honest—motherhood is demanding, but you’re still you. Keep up with your career goals or hobbies in a way that feels doable. A part of your identity is linked to the work you do, so don’t completely disconnect.
Reach Out for Help: Motherhood is a team sport. Find the support that makes you feel empowered, whether that’s a postpartum doula, a therapist, or a support group. You don’t have to do it all on your own.
You’re More Than Just ‘Mom’—You’re a Whole Person
Motherhood doesn’t mean you have to sacrifice your identity. In fact, you shouldn’t have to. Yes, you’re about to step into a big new chapter, but your well-being is just as important as your role as a mom. Remember, you’re worthy of support, you’re worthy of taking care of yourself, and you’re worthy of living a life that’s fulfilling for you—not just for your baby.
Ready to own your identity in motherhood? Check out my ebook - THE NEW MOM BLUEPRINT: TAKING CHARGE YOUR WELL-BEING.. It’s packed with practical tips, templates, and everything you need to stay grounded and true to yourself during this big life change. Trust me, this is one step that’ll make all the difference in your journey.
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Let’s talk about something that’s probably been swirling in your mind as you prepare for life with a new baby: your identity. Yep, the person you’ve always been, the one you’ve worked so hard to shape, and the one you fear might get a little lost in the shuffle of diaper changes, feedings, and sleepless nights.